User blog:Nanepul/the tale of a fallen angel with a headache or the battle between two fears and god

E1 11/5/14 5:47 PM. You see here’s the problem, I’ve got a migraine. I don’t know where it came from and what do about it because Tylenol doesn’t work on who I am. Who am I you may ask? My name is John and I’m a fallen angel. I know what your thinking “oh like Satan and demons and such” and my reply is no. im not that kind of fallen angel. Im a fallen angel because I tried to rid the world of a horrible being and some eerie bastard donning a animal skull with red eyes and the fellas upstairs didn’t like it and demoted me.

Anyway, since then I’ve been plagued with a unholy headache and so many damn things to do you’d swear I was atlas. I have to take care of college work (angel age is equivalent to human year in thousands. I’m 22 thousand years old so logically I must be 22 in human years), keep up with my job, take care of friends (people I used to be guardians for, a few ghost, a few gifted ones etc. etc.) and try to find a way to defeat or get rid of “the liquid obsession” (as ive grown to call it) and that creepy animal skull-headed jerk.. I’ve noticed signs of the two in different areas but have never really gotten far in my research. Im sure that if I found a way to rid them of this world id be let back in to the room upstairs but until then im shit out of luck.

E2 11/21/14 2:19 PM. “Thank god it’s Friday” was what I said to myself in the middle of my dorm whilst typing a story for my language arts class late on a, you guessed it, Friday afternoon. The reason I said that is that during Fridays and Saturdays Im able to use a extended amount of my God-given gifts (flight, speed, invulnerability to common things, the fun stuff) and then unfortunately on Sundays I lose them and am forced to suffer any injuries I should/ would have dealt or been inflicted…including death. Thankfully I cant really die, I just suffer and fall unconscious and magically wake up in my bed sore and sick as hell and along with that there’s always a storm or some shit to make it worse.

The migrane still hasn’t gone away and im still living my painfully monotonous life in search of the two things that made things the way they are now. Ever since my falling ive been obsessed with them and such and barely have time to write these small entries and deal with all the other shit going on but alas I feel like I need to write them in order to keep a little bit of sanity in this messed world Im damned to live in. It honestly feels like im the only one who knows. Im waging a war behind my face and above my throat. The shadows all around are screaming that im alone but I know that ive made it this far.

E3 11/24/14 7:31 AM. I took a look at my previous entries and noticied that my thoughts and words are a bit everywhere and I promise I don’t intend that im just writing for my own sake and a lot more recently it feels like im a bit everywhere and am in no control of whats going on and cant stop the things around me and cant manage all the damn things I have to do but I know that god has a plan so I wont let the paranoid freshman down the hall who always wearing trilbys convince me that theres some kooky marionette doll controlling shit but I digress. Ive discovered a little bit more on the liquid obsession the past few days but I cant seem to find any consistencies except for the occasional high camper claiming “nirvana” or “at ease with eat” or have all seen bits and bobs of the liquid obsession. I havnt discovered anything more on the animal skull dude but im sure hell show up sooner than later. People have said that im growing irritable and obsessive but they don’t know whats going on and there not freaking angels and shit so screw them! im not irritable and obsessive im just determined to get back to the place I belong and be happy and at peace and at rest with our heavenly host.

E4 12/10/14 9:07 PM. I AM NOT AS FINE AS I SEEM !!! excuse me for yelling im just tired of trying to explain that im COMPLETELY FINE im just very dedicated to the goal at hand. I don’t care if im failing at school or that im fired from my job I need to focus on the mystery of those two STUPID FUCKS!!! I need to find and destroy them or else I will most surely go mad and destroy something and then I definetly wont be let back into the realm of the heavenly host and ill be stuck in this god forsaken place damned to roam it until judgment. Here ill paint a mental picture for you, its like im at a door between me and there but the knockings at my head as I continue to suffer this DAMNED MIGRANE!!! While I struggle to find a single bit of information on the liquid obsession or even that red eyed animal skulled bastard. I heard some lyrics I keep repeating to myself nonstop and I ponder what they mean while I anxiously continue on.

“''my mind's shipwrecked, this is the only land my mind could find ''

''I did not know it was such a violent island ''

''Full of tidal waves, suicidal crazed lions ''

''They're trying to eat me, blood running down their chin ''

''and I know that I can fight or I can let the lion win ''

''I begin to assemble what weapons I can find ''

'''Cause sometimes to stay alive you got to kill your mind” ''

 

E% SATURDAY NIGHT. IVE REACHED THE END OF IT ALL. IM DONE. IM FINISHED. IVE DONE ALL THAT I CAN AND I CANT FIGURE OUT THOSE FUCKING GOD-DAMNED FUCKS THAT HAVE HAUNTED ME AND HAVE PLAUGED ME WITH THIS GOD-DAMNED MIGRANE. IM AT THE POINT WHERE IM PRETTY GOD-DAMNED SURE HES NO LONGER LOOKING OUT FOR ME AND HAS MOST LIKELY FORGOTTEN ABOUT ME, ONE OF HIS ANGELS. IM DONE. no im not done im not like this im sure of it god still knows and has a plan ABSOLUTLY FUCKING NOT! IM AS MUCH OF A GOD AS HE IS no we ae not. We made a mistake and went after something that’s made us what we are AND WHAT IS THAT HUH? HUH?!?!? WE ARE JUST A SIMPLE BEING! WERE NOT ANYTHING SPECIAL ANYMORE! No. we are special we are angels of the lord meant to help humans FUCK THAT! AND YOU KNOW WHAT? FUCK YOU!! YOU ARE THE MOST GOD-DAMN ANNOYING FUCKING THING ! DO YOU KNOW THAT? YOU WITH ALL YOUR HELP PEOPLE AND REDEM OURSELVES BULLSHIT!! FUCK IT! No. we are not like this. Think about it. I HAVE THOUGHT ABOUT IT AND THEN I THOUGHT THAT A GUN WOULD WORK BETTER don’t do this! We have so much we need to do! We cant just end it here OH WHAT YOU THINK THISLL END IT? ARE OUR GOD-FUCKING-GIVEN GIFTS ALL GONE? WELL THEN LETS SEE?!?!?



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<p class="MsoNormal">E6 12/25/14 1:25 PM. ''“And I will say that we should take a day to break away ''

<p class="MsoNormal">''from all the pain our brain has made ''

<p class="MsoNormal">''the game is not played alone ''

<p class="MsoNormal">And I will say that we should take a moment and hold it 

<p class="MsoNormal">''and keep it frozen and know that life has a hopeful undertone” ''

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<p class="MsoNormal">I woke up that Sunday morning and went somewhere that I hadn’t gone to and I talked to someone I hadn’t talked to in a while and I went home and took a shower and it felt like a cold empty slime had been washed off. Im still after the liquid obsession and the animal skull guy but I have more important things to do. There are people who need help, I don’t know who, but they need help. I will help them and I will live the life I am given. I know happy Christmas endings are a little cliché but this what has happened and this what im writing for whoever may need it and I know it all may be confusing but I promise ill be back around soon. This is the last entry of john the fallen angel, and I no longer have a migraine